Bungards have known about Lambert’s for many years, and in these restricted times where people are having to think a little more ‘outside the box’ when it comes to celebrating a loved ones memory we would like to share with you their story.

Lambert’s White Dove Release Brighton was started up in 2015 by Viv Lambert and her daughter Laura. The family run company was started in Enfield in 2009 by Viv’s cousin, they have over 100 birds at their London home and 5 years ago Viv decided to bring doves to the people of Sussex. They have two purpose built dove cottages that currently house about 60 doves – most of whom are now tame enough to feed by hand each day.

The beautiful birds fly freely unless there is a release, then their cottage is closed the night before so they can catch the required number to pop in baskets the next morning. Once in the baskets, they settle and wait happily for release time, then as soon as they’ve performed their service they fly straight back home to meet up with their ‘family’ and enjoy their supper.

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Viv explains that “our doves are loved and precious to us, and their welfare is paramount so we never carry out releases indoors, in severe weather conditions or in the dark. Each one of our doves has been extensively and carefully trained to navigate back to its home once released”

Viv then goes on to explain the release process “An experienced handler will arrive with the doves and meet the family at a previously agreed place. The family or person who has booked our dove(s) will be handed the dove, ready for release in its carrier. They may release the dove(s) as and when they wish. Our doves can be removed from the carrier and released by hand if you prefer”

So why have a dove release at a funeral, surely doves are more synonymous with weddings?

Letting go can be one of the hardest things we ever have to do, yet all of us at some time have to do it. For millennia and across cultures, doves have symbolised love, peace and new beginnings. Cradling one gently then releasing it to soar and fly free, watching as it circles and orientates before purposefully heading for home can be a powerful way of relieving grief associated with the loss of a loved one. The message of the dove is simple: life changes shape and form while the love lives on, blessing us forever.

For further information on the doves, to arrange a bespoke release or to speak to Viv about any questions you may have please click here

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One example could be a Memorial Service held in the Extra Mural Chapel, which is set in

the extensive grounds of Woodvale Crematorium.

This beautiful little chapel was built in 1851, can hold up to 80 people and has its own

entrance from the Lewes Road.

We can help you to choose a celebrant or minister to take your Memorial, design your

service sheets with you and even arrange a release of White Doves or Butterflies to

complete your tribute if so desired.

If you would like to arrange a memorial but don’t know quite where to start

give us a call and we can help you create something personal and fitting.

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A Grief Observed by CS Lewis

This classic text of grief is still one of the best books on this subject, even though it is viewed through the lens of a religious feeling in an increasingly secular world. This book was written from the four journals that Lewis kept whilst dealing with the loss of his wife to cancer after only three years of marriage. This is a ground level study of grief, and the observations that Lewis makes in response to his wife’s death are moving and profound. Click here to purchase

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A Moveable Feast by Ernest Hemingway

Hemingway wrote his memoir at the end of his life to address the writer and man he was at the beginning of his life. It details his years in Paris with his first wife, Hadley, and it is an account of a man grieving for the happiness that accompanied those early years. The grief, in old age, for ones youth, comes to us all in some form, and no one expresses this grief so beautifully and poignantly as Hemingway does in this little book. Click here to purchase

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A Very Easy Death by Simone de Beauvoir

When someone is dying of cancer there is a kind of pre-grief that happens while the dying person becomes less themselves through to the changed to their physical body brought about on by the cancer. This short memoir is a powerful account of De Beauvoir’s mothers last days, written in a brutally honest prose that spares the reader nothing of the horrors of an individual life coming close to death. Click here to purchase

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Healing Grief by Barbara Ward

A practical guide to help people through all kinds of grieving processes. The author considers divorce and separation, life-threatening illnesses, living with handicap, bereavement and children, death and dying. In each case, her material is illustrated by stories of people she has worked with. Click here to purchase

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The Courage to Grieve by Judy Tatelbaum

This unusual self-help book about surviving grief offers the reader comfort and inspiration. Judy Tatelbaum gives us a fresh look at understanding grief, showing us that grief is a natural, inevitable human experience, including all the unexpected, intense and uncomfortable emotions like sorrow, guilt, loneliness, resentment, confusion, or even the temporary loss of the will to live. The emphasis is to clarify and offer help, and the tone is spiritual, optimistic, creative and easy to understand. Click here to purchase

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The Early Days of Grieving by Derek Nuttal

This simple and straightforward book is for those who have recently lost a loved one, offering direct and personal support, explanation, and information. Click here to purchase

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The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying

Written by the Buddhist meditation master and popular international speaker Sogyal Rinpoche, this highly acclaimed book clarifies the majestic vision of life and death that underlies the Tibetan Buddhist tradition. It includes not only a lucid, inspiring and complete introduction to the practice of meditation, but also advice on how to care for the dying with love and compassion, and how to bring them help of a spiritual kind. But there is much more besides in this classic work, which was written to inspire all who read it to begin the journey to enlightenment and so become ‘servants of peace’. Click here to purchase

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‘You’ll Get Over It’: The Rage of Bereavement by Virginia Ironside

The death of a loved one is the most traumatic experience any of us face. No two people cope with it the same way: some cry while others remain dry-eyed; some discover growth through pain, others find arid wastes; some feel angry, others feel numb. Virginia Ironside deals with this complicated and sensitive issue with great frankness and insight, drawing on other’s people’s accounts as well as her own experiences. Click here to purchase

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Help to protect your loved ones from the worry and expense of your funeral with a pre-paid funeral plan from Bungard & Sons.

If like 700,000 other people you want to make sure your funeral is done your way with the minimal amount of fuss to your next of kin then consider a funeral plan to make things easier. We have carefully chosen Golden Charter to partner with over all of the other funeral plan providers as they are actually owned by Independent Funeral Directors like us and have over 25 years of experience. Plus they are the only funeral plan provider recommended by our governing body SAIF (Society of Allied & Independent Funeral Directors) so we know we and our families are in safe hands.

Your money is well protected with Golden Charter, and you can choose to pay in full or in instalments depending on your preference. Also depending on how you pay your funds will either go into the Golden Charter Trust which is worth about £1.126 billion pounds or paid into one of the UK’s leading life assurance policies. Golden Charter is also a Funeral Planning Authority registered provider which means they are committed to protecting customers’ payments and guarantee to cover the funeral director’s services included in your plan.

All in all we think that purchasing a pre paid Funeral Plan from Golden Charter is one of the most sensible things you can do, it ensures your wishes are adhered to and it makes sure that your loved ones do not have to deal with the worry of wondering what you may have wanted and of course having to find the funds for your funeral. At the time of need one phone call to us from your next of kin is all it takes to set the wheels in motion and for us to start arranging your wishes. We pride ourselves on the level of care and professionalism we provide to every one of our families and as we are Brighton & Hove’s Oldest Independent Funeral Directors we have picked up a thing or two over the last 113 years! We are now on our 5th generation of funeral directors and plan on staying around for another 100 years so your funeral will be in very safe hands.

Please feel free to call us, email us or pop in and have a chat if you would like to know more about our plans, we can tailor to your needs so no matter how simple or extravagant a send off you desire we can accommodate your wishes exactly.

• Dick Miller, 90, was a star of 1980s classics such as Gremlins and The Terminator.
• Michel Legrand, 86, was an Oscar-winning composer who worked with the likes of Frank Sinatra, Miles Davis, Ray Charles, Aretha Franklin, Liza Minnelli, Edith Piaf and Barbra Streisand.
• Windsor Davies, 88, was best known for starring as Battery Sergeant Major Williams in It Ain’t Half Hot Mum. Aged 88.
• Andre Previn, 89, worked on films such as Gigi, Porgy and Bess, My Fair Lady and Irma La Douce – and he won best music Oscars for all four.
• Drummer Andy Anderson, 68, was best known for his time with The Cure in the 1980s, but also worked with Iggy Pop, Peter Gabriel, the Sex Pistols’ Glen Matlock and Mike Oldfield during his career.
• Peter Tork was one of the founding members of 1960s pop band The Monkees, famed for hit songs such as Daydream Believer and I’m A Believer. He died aged 77.
• Best known for his roles in The Sopranos and Casino, Vinny Vella, 72, starred in dozens of films throughout the 1990s and 2000s, often playing a gangster.
• Instantly recognisable for his distinctive white ponytail, black sunglasses, gloves and high starched collars, Karl Lagerfeld, 85, was one of the world’s most famous fashion designers.
• England’s World Cup-winning goalkeeper of 1966, Gordon Banks, 81, made 73 international appearances during his footballing career.
• Jan-Michael Vincent, 73, rose to prominence in the 1980s, playing pilot Stringfellow Hawke in US TV series Airwolf, about a high-tech military helicopter and its crew.
• A five-time Oscar nominee, British film legend Albert Finney, 82, was known for playing many different characters, with his list of films including Erin Brockovich, Big Fish, Scrooge, Annie and Murder On The Orient Express.
• Clive Swift was best known for playing Richard Bucket, the long-suffering husband of Hyacinth Bucket, in the classic comedy Keeping Up Appearances. Clive died aged 82.
• Comedian Jeremy Hardy, 57, was a regular guest on radio panel shows The News Quiz and I’m Sorry I Haven’t A Clue.
• Mike Thalassitis was a footballer and one of the stars of season three of reality TV hit Love Island in 2017. Mike died aged 26.
• TV presenter Magenta Divine, 61, was known for her trademark black sunglasses, stylish attire and husky voice.
• Luke Perry became a household name for his role as heartthrob Dylan McKay in US teen show Beverly Hills 90210 between 1990 and 2000. Luke was 52.
• Keith Flint, 49, was frontman of The Prodigy, the twisted firestarter who brought the sound of British rave music to an audience of millions across the world.
• As Chewbacca, the 7ft 3ins Peter Mayhew, 74, was a fierce warrior with a soft heart; a loyal sidekick to Harrison Ford’s Han Solo and co-pilot of the Millennium Falcon.
• Rowland ‘Boon’ Gould was a founding member of British band Level 42, alongside his brother Phil, Mark King and Mike Lindup. Rowland was 64.
• Ken Kercheval, 83, was best known as oil tycoon Cliff Barnes, rival of Larry Hagman’s scheming oil baron JR Ewing, in US TV series Dallas.
• Liverpool legend Tommy Smith, 74, played for the Merseyside football club for 18 years and was affectionately nicknamed the “Anfield Iron” by supporters.
• Sandy Ratcliff, 70, was one of the original cast members of BBC soap EastEnders, playing cafe owner Sue Osman between 1985 and 1989.
• The Tiger Who Came To Tea, by Judith Kerr, has never been out of print since being published in 1968, selling more than five million copies. It is the author’s best known book, among others including When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit and the Mog The Cat series. Judith passed aged 95.
• Formula 1 legend Niki Lauda,70, was a three-time world champion and the only man to have won the drivers’ title for both Ferrari and McLaren.
• Grumpy Cat, real name Tardar Sauce, had 1.5 million followers on Twitter, more than 8 million followers on Facebook and 2.4 million on Instagram when she died in May 2019.
• After retiring from acting, Doris Day had been very private, accepting the Cecil B DeMille award at the Golden Globes in 1989 and doing her last TV interview five years later. She died of pneumonia aged 97.
• Former WCW wrestler Silver King, real name Cesar Barron, starred opposite Hollywood star Jack Black in the 2006 comedy Nacho Libre collapsed in the ring aged 51.
• Brian Walden, 86, was a broadcaster and former Labour MP who was best known for an interview with Margaret Thatcher in 1989 which helped bring about the end of her time as prime minister.
• Comedian Freddie Starr, 76, became a household name after rising to fame in the 1970s, but was undoubtedly best known for The Sun’s infamous 1986 front page, “Freddie Starr Ate My Hamster” – one of the best known headlines in the history of British tabloids.
• Heartbeat actor William Simons, 79, played the role of PC Alf Ventress in the hit TV police drama for nearly two decades, starring in all 18 series of the show between 1992 and 2010.
• Gloria Vanderbilt, 95, was a US fashion icon, author, actress and socialite, the great-great-granddaughter of financier Cornelius Vanderbilt, who made headlines throughout her life.
• Ex-Arsenal striker Jose Antonio Reyes formed part of the iconic team who won the Premiership trophy without suffering any losses during what is now known as the club’s “invincible” season in 2003-04. Jose was 35.
• “King of the Broadway musical” Harold ‘Hal’ Prince, 91, worked on shows including Phantom Of The Opera and Sweeney Todd, winning a record 21 Tony awards in a theatre career which spanned seven decades.
• Actor Rutger Hauer, 75, appeared in more than 100 Dutch and international films and won a Golden Globe for his role in the 1988 film Escape from Sobibor.
• Brendan Grace, 68, played Father Fintan Stack in the cult TV comedy series Father Ted, and was also a stand-up comedian.
• Denise Nickerson, 62, played golden ticket winner Violet Beauregarde in the 1971 film adaptation of Roald Dahl’s bestselling novel, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
• Emmerdale star Freddie Jones was described as one of the TV soap’s “favourite human beings” following his death at 91. The father of fellow actor Toby Jones played Sandy Thomas in the ITV show
• Rip Torn, 88, was an award-winning television, film and theatre actor who starred in Dodgeball and Men In Black following his film debut as a former prisoner of war in Time Limit in 1957.
• John McCririck, 79, was the famous racing broadcaster known for his outlandish dress sense and provocative broadcasting style, who also achieved fame through appearances on entertainment programmes including Celebrity Big Brother and Celebrity Wife Swap.
• Doctor Who writer and script editor Terrance Dicks wrote for the long-running TV science fiction series from 1968 to 1983, for the second, third and fourth Doctors; played by Patrick Troughton, Jon Pertwee and Tom Baker. Terrance was 84.
• According to US magazine Car And Driver, jetcar racer Jessi Combs, 36, was widely known in racing circles as the “fastest woman on four wheels”, and broke a record in 2013 with a run of 393mph (632kmph).
• Peter Fonda, 79, was born in New York in 1940 to Hollywood star Henry and his socialite wife Frances Ford Seymour, and was the younger brother of Jane Fonda.
• Nobel Prize winner Toni Morrison, 88, was the first black woman to receive the prize for literature, which she was awarded in 1993.She also won the Pulitzer Prize for fiction in 1988 for her novel Beloved
• Entertainer and impressionist Joe Longthorne, 64, performed to millions of people around the world and sang at the Royal Variety Show several times, in a career which spanned several decades. He also earned an MBE for his charity work in 2012.
• Robert Mugabe was the former president of Zimbabwe ousted in a military coup after 37 years in power. The 95-year-old had ruled the country, a former British colony, from 1980 and was the world’s oldest head of state before his dramatic exit two years ago.
• Nicknamed “Le Bulldozer” early in his career for his determination and ambition, former French president Jacques Chirac, 86, led the country between 1995 and 2007.
• Former Glasgow Rangers footballer Fernando Ricksen, 43, spent six years playing for the club and earned 12 caps for the Netherlands at international level.
• South Africa rugby legend Chester Williams, 49, was famously the only black player in the Springboks squad that won the Rugby World Cup on home soil in 1995.
• German fashion photographer Peter Lindbergh, 74, was known for his dramatic but simple black and white portraits, having worked with supermodels including Kate Moss, Helena Christensen, Cindy Crawford and Christy Turlington.
• In a journalistic career spanning 40 years, Peter Sissons, 77, became one of British television’s most experienced and influential newsreaders. He presented the BBC’s Nine O’Clock News from 1994 and was considered to be one of the UK’s longest-serving news presenters when he retired from broadcasting in 2009.
• Ginger Baker, 80, was the drummer and co-founder of rock band Cream with Eric Clapton in 1966, and also performed with Hawkwind, Blind Faith and Fela Kuti.
• Reg Watson’s “legacy lives on in Ramsay Street” – the fictional road on which the long-running Australian soap Neighbours has been set since it made its debut in 1985. As the creator of the series he helped launch the careers of some of the biggest stars in Australian entertainment before passing aged 93.
• Belgian Paralympian Marieke Vervoort, 40, won gold and silver in wheelchair racing events at the London 2012 Paralympics, and two further medals at Rio 2016.
• Robert Freeman, 82, was the man behind some of The Beatles’ most famous album covers, helping to define the band’s image with the 1963 cover for With The Beatles, their second album.
• Gary Rhodes, 59, worked in restaurants around the world and was one of the first big TV chefs, starring in programmes including Rhodes Around Britain and MasterChef.
• British theatre director and presenter Jonathan Miller, 85, was one of the most renowned figures in the arts, following a decades-long career that encompassed theatre, television and opera.
• Beloved critic and broadcaster Clive James, 80, was admired for his wit and ability with words, both as a writer and broadcaster, and appeared frequently on radio as well as on TV from the 1970s to the 2010s.
• Former England captain and Sky cricket expert Bob Willis, 70, was a mainstay of the England team for more than a decade, playing in 90 Tests and 64 one-day internationals after his debut in 1971.
• Award-winning actor Ron Leibman, 82, was a star of stage and screen, but readily acknowledged he would perhaps always be best known for playing the father of Rachel Green in Friends.
• Puppeteer Caroll Spinney, 85, portrayed the beloved Sesame Street characters Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch until he was well into his 80s.
• Singer and actor Kenny Lynch, 81, was known for his 1960s hit Up On The Roof and appearance in Pinewood comedy Carry On Loving.

Richard, Ben, Zoe and Ray would like to wish all of our families and our local community a peaceful Christmas, and a very happy New Year.
We are available throughout the festive period 24 hours a day. Wishing everyone a happy, safe and peaceful Christmas time              

The Bungards Team x

I CAME ACROSS THIS ARTICLE LAST WEEK, WHAT DO YOU THINK OF HUMAN COMPOSTING?
In April 2019, Washington became the first US state to legalize the composting of human bodies. As a result of this new legislation, the world’s first-ever composting site, Recompose, will open its doors in spring 2021 in Seattle’s SoDo neighborhood.
Plans for the facility drawn by Olson Kundig Architects in collaboration with Katrina Spade, founder and CEO of Recompose, were released yesterday and it looks nothing like a traditional funeral home.

The 18,500-square-foot facility is a light-filled open space decorated with an abundance of greenery that can be moved around.

The space is comprised of 75 hexagonal-shaped vessels where bodies are stored for decomposition. All the vessels are stacked, looking a little like a beehive, around a gathering space meant for ceremonies.
Human composting is believed to be significantly more environmentally friendly than traditional methods of burial or cremation. Recompose’s patent-pending method involves placing bodies in one of the moisture- and temperature-controlled vessels filled with wood chips, alfalfa, and straw. In just 30 days of microbial activity, the body breaks down into soil. Recompose’s human composting consumes just one eighth of the energy required for cremation.
The human composting process generates around a cubic yard of soil from the human body. Mourners can choose to keep the resulting soil or Recompose can use it to help reforest land in southern Washington.
Credit to Eben Diskin – Matador Network – November 2019.

This year we held our Remembrance Service in conjunction with St. Barnabas church and had a lovely big turn out. Thank you to all who came and enjoyed Fr. Johns moving service and helped us to devour a mountain of mince pies and mulled wine afterwards!
The ‘Lights of Love’ look spectacular on the tree outside the church, make sure you take a look if you are passing Sackville Road and take a little moment to remember your special loved ones like we did on Monday.
If you find yourself facing Christmas alone this year and would prefer not to be, please do get in touch with us for advice on local activities in the area you can join in with.
Bungards wish you all a happy and peaceful Christmas time.

This is a lovely little story I came across, make sure you keep filling up your account!

A 92-year-old delicate but well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with his hair fashionably coifed and his face shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today.

His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready.

As he manoeuvred his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.

‘I love it,’ he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy. ‘Mr. Jones, you haven’t seen the room; just wait.’

‘That doesn’t have anything to do with it,’ he replied. ‘Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged … it’s how I arrange my mind.

I already decided to love it. ‘It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do.’

‘Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open, I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away. Just for this time in my life.’

‘Old age is like a bank account. You withdraw from what you’ve put in.’

‘So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories! Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank. I am still depositing.’

Golden Charter looks at the almost universal trend for documenting every aspect of our lives using our smartphone cameras, from holiday destinations to what we’re having for dinner, it’s little surprise that there are an increasing number of photographs taken at funerals.

A 2015 survey in the Telegraph showed that one third of mourners admitted to taking “selfies” at funerals, mainly to get sympathy on social media. Many are in bad taste and highlight a lack of awareness that sharing pictures from a funeral on social media can cause real distress for grieving relatives.

But the strong reaction people have to funeral photographs is not just about selfie sharing on social networks – people are generally not particularly comfortable with the idea of taking photographs at a funeral.

Many people bristle at the thought of funeral photographs, seeing it as disrespectful and an invasion of mourners’ privacy. Some people question why anyone would want to remember such a sad affair in photographic detail. Others are distressed by the notion of posing for a funeral photograph the way they might for a wedding photograph, feeling that they need to hide their emotions for the sake of the camera.

But there is a small but growing consensus that, if we record every other significant event in our life, why not the passing of our loved ones?  For many families, a funeral is one of the very few times that all members of the extended family come together in one place, making it a unique opportunity to capture a truly cross-generational photograph.

A unique family memento

So whilst some may perceive it to be a bad idea to take out your phone to shoot a quick selfie or gather together grieving family members for a photo opportunity, considerate funeral photography can provide a unique family memento of a special time.

If you plan to take photographs at the funeral of a friend or family members, be sure to ask permission of the family members organising the funeral. You should also ask the permission of the location where the funeral service is taking place. The attending funeral director may also be able to give advice.

While you can take photographs yourself, there is a growing number of professional funeral photographers who will ensure that photographs are taken discreetly and sensitively. A good funeral photographer can cover all aspects of the send-off, from the service to the wake.

Funeral photography isn’t to everyone’s taste, but as more and more people come to see funerals as celebrations of a life past rather than a sombre mourning ritual, it is likely we will start to see professional photographers document the proceedings the way they would a wedding or a christening.

Funeral photographer Alison Burke says on her website: “More and more we are seeking to commemorate the life of the person we are bidding farewell to in a celebratory and positive manner.”

She explains that funeral photographs have to do some good for those who remain in life. “It has to be carried out thoughtfully, with compassion and respect, but above all else, it must come from the heart, and when it does, it can be a beautiful and touching way to remember this significant moment.”